File this one under “headlines we never thought we’d write”: IKEA Australia have responded to Kanye West’s plea to work with the furniture giant with some pretty bloody genius shade.

IKEA Australia posted this master class on Facebook:

https://www.facebook.com/ikea.au/photos/a.276205668287.144759.112605923287/10154389308918288/?type=3&theater

In case you’re not sure, that’s a gigantic interlocking bed. Perfect for, oh, we don’t know, maybe 12 naked celebrities? Check the Famous riff too. This is high quality tongue in cheek stuff, juuuust subtle enough that some may not pick up on it straight away, but then once you see it it’s painfully obvious. Pretty clever of them, really: responding to Yeezy’s insistence that he be taken seriously as a designer by churlishly reminding the world of his eye-roll worthy non-statement of a video. Someone give whoever mans social media for IKEA Australia a damn medal.

All jokes aside, though, Kanye really IS serious about design, even if his attempts are sometimes somewhat misguided. He’s previously said that he’s been “working with five architects at a time”, and set up his own design company in 2012, DONDA, named for his late mother.

Kanye expressed his burning desire to work collaboratively alongside IKEA while speaking to BBC 1’s Annie Mac, saying “I have to work with IKEA – make furniture for interior design, for architecture…Yo Ikea, allow Kanye to create, allow him to make this thing because you know what, I want a bed that he makes, I want a chair that he makes”.

The passion is definitely there, folks, but IKEA aren’t having a bar. They’re just having a laugh and we get to watch it all play out. As much as there are many many more important things going on in the world, we’re kinda looking forward to Yeezy’s reaction now.

What a time to be alive, hey?

Read more: Kanye Affirms Presidential Bid, Talks IKEA and Salutes Bon Iver

Image: FamousFace

This evening in the USA, Kanye West received the Vanguard Award at the MTV VMAs. In a twisted turn of fate, it was none other than Taylor Swift who presented the rapper/producer with the honour.

In true Kanye fashion, he proceeded to share an glorious, all-encompassing 13-minute acceptance speech. Of course Swift and West’s past beefs were brought up in jest – Swift (who watched the speech arm in arm with Kim Kardashian), pulled out the “Imma let you finish” line, while West acknowledged the 2009 Grammys incident, saying that he fights for artist, but he knows he’s been disrespectful. explaining that seeing Justin Timberlake in tears, inspired him to speak out.

In a funny and poignant speech, he talks everything from buying juice in the supermarket with his daughter, to the fluid nature of music and experiences, from ‘fighting for artists’

 

“Listen to the kids, bro!” He cries. “I still don’t understand award shows,” he starts off on a tirade against award shows and MTV. Growing more and more passionate, he talks abou thow he’ll die for his art – and how he’ll be running for president in 2020.

Read the full transcript here courtesy of The Verge:

Bro, bro, listen to the kids. Jeremy, I got to put it down for a second, it’s beautiful, Jeremy Scott designed… First of all, thank you Taylor for being so gracious and giving me this award this evening. And I often think back to the first day that I met you. Also, you know, I think about when I’m in the grocery store with my daughter and I have a really great conversation about fresh juice, you know, and at the end they say, “You’re not that bad after all.” And I think about it sometimes, like it crosses my mind when I go to a baseball game and 60,000 people boo me. It crosses my mind a little bit.

And I think, if I had to do it all again, what would i have done? Would I have worn a leather shirt? Would I have drank half a bottle of Hennessy and given the rest to the audience? Y’all know you drank that bottle too. If I had a daughter at that time, would I have went on stage and grabbed the mic from someone else’s…

You know this arena, tomorrow, it’s gonna be a completely different set up or something like that. This stage will be gone. After that night, the stage will be gone, but the effect it had on people will remain. The problem was the contradiction. The contradiction is: I do fight for artists, but in that fight I somehow was disrespectful to artists. I didn’t know how to say the right thing, the perfect thing. I just… I sat at the Grammys and saw Justin Timberlake and Cee-Lo lose. Gnarls Barkley and the Future Sex album… Justin, I ain’t trying to put you on blast but I saw that man in tears, bro. And I was thinking like, he deserves to win album of the year. And this small box that we are in as the entertainers of the evening. How could you explain that? Sometimes I feel like, you know, all this bullshit that they run about beef and all that, sometimes I feel like I died for the artist’s opinion. For the artists to be able to have an opinion after they were successful. I’m not no politician, bro. And look at that. You know how many times MTV ran that footage again? ’cause it got them more ratings. You know how many times they announced that Taylor was gonna give me the award? ’cause it got them more ratings. Listen to the kids, bro.

I still don’t understand award shows. I don’t understand how they get five people who worked their entire life one sold records, sold concert tickets, to come stand on a carpet and for the first time in their life be judged on a chopping block and have the opportunity to be considered a loser. I don’t understand it, brah. I don’t understand when the biggest album and the biggest video… I’ve been conflicted, bro! I just wanted people to like me more. Fuck it bro.

Two thousand and fifteen. I will die for the art, for what I believe in. The art ain’t always gonna be polite. Y’all might be thinking right now, “I wonder, did he smoke something before he came here?” The answer is yes, I rolled up a little something to knock the edge off. I don’t know what’s gonna happen tonight. I don’t know what’s gonna happen tomorrow, bro. But all I can say to my artist, my fellow artist, just worry about how you feel at the time man. Just worry about how you feel and don’t never… I’m confident, I believe in myself. We the millennials, bro. This is a new mentality. We’re not gonna control our kids with brands. We’re not gonna teach low self esteem and that to our kids. We gonna teach our kids that they can be something. We’re gonna teach our kids that they can stand up for themselves. We’re gonna teach our kids to believe in themselves. If my grandfather was here right now he would not let me back down. I don’t know what I’m finna lose after this, but don’t matter though cause it’s not about me. It’s about ideas bro, new ideas bro. People with ideas. People who believe in truth. And yes, as you probably could have guessed by this moment, I have decided in 2020 to run for president.

Kanye West’s new album has had yet another development, revealing today the name of his new album will be called So Help Me God. The announcement was made via Twitter, and was accompanied by a potential album cover which in typical Kanye fashion, is a religious symbol. Allegedly it refers to a 13th century monastic symbol for the Virgin Mary (if you believe Reddit that is).

But surely the surprises are running out. The last few weeks have seen a slew of new material from the album pour across the internet via various performances. After Only One was officially confirmed as the first single, Wolves was debuted at Kanye’s own fashion show promoting his new Adidas shoe with the help of our own Sia (in a enormous blond bob no less) and Vic Mensa and then again at the 40th anniversary of Saturday Night Live. Meanwhile, his collaboration with Rihanna and Paul McCartney FourFiveSeconds continues to claw up the charts around the world. Further still, with the help of a black-clad mob with flame-throwers, Kanye debutedanother track from his album, All Day, at the Brit Awards.

But even though a track list is growing every day, there is no confirmation of a release date anytime soon. In the vein of Beyonce and Drake, it will be a surprise release to shield from incessant online leaks. If Drake’s album release is anything to go by, the tactic works – he has landed a ridiculous 14 songs on the US charts at the one time, equally that of the Beatles, last achieved over 50 years ago.

For now, we wait.