Let’s put aside issues of race. Let’s put aside issues of body shaming. Nicki Minaj’s rant about being snubbed by the MTV VMA panel for ‘Video of the Year’ is a case of petulance, pure and simple. After Taylor Swift offered to ‘share the stage’ with Minaj, she retorted, “trust me. I’ll be on that stage to collect my awards for vid of the year”. This is about a culture of entitlement, and a complete lack of grace and sportsmanship amongst artists. I don’t expect people like Nicki Minaj and Kanye West to be role models. I do expect them to be adults. Whining when you don’t win an award is ugly, childish and embarrassing.
The fact that this outrage is directed at the MTV Video Music Awards makes the whole thing evern more farcical. Wait, you’re saying that MTV is not a paragon of virtue committed to the highest ideals of equity and artistic truth? You’re telling me that the network responsible for Engaged and Underage, 16 and Pregnant and Jersey Shore isn’t a champion of artistic merit, and is really just pursuing the lowest common denominator for their exclusively preteen and stoner audience? This is an outrage. There needs to be a Congressional Inquiry. There couldn’t be a contest of less prestige. The VMAs never have, or never will be, a barometer of artistic achievement. Complaining about losing at the VMA’s would be like Halle Berry wrestling Sandra Bullock for her Razzie. Or Nick Cannon spear-tackling Cody Simpson, so that he can soak up that sweet self-assuring slime from the Nickelodeon Kids Choice Awards. Or when a dad flips out at the Auskick presentation night when his sprocket only comes runner-up in the under 6’s least improved category. Nicki Minaj has been recognized time and time again for her achievements. Chucking a hissy fit over losing out on this most vacuous of awards demonstrates that she is a brat plain and simple.
The VMA’s have a long and proud history as an institution of good taste and discernment.
Notice how these artists are quick to point out when they (or their closest friends) are cheated, but don’t feel compelled to speak up for smaller, independent acts that get looked over. They claim to “respect artistry” but what they really respect is themselves. They’re never indignant when someone with whom they have no association is robbed. There’s a real argument that Sia’s Elastic Heart video was the best pop video of the year, after her Chandelier clip lost to Miley Cyrus’ Wrecking Ball in 2014. But no one is in Sia’s corner, because they’re only in their own corner. Or what about FKA Twigs’ Glass & Patron clip? If Kanye West respected artistry he would be bum-rushing the stage saying that FKA Twigs was robbed.
I’ll agree that whilst Minaj’s Anaconda clip is completely asinine, it is iconic; but is there not the possibility, the smallest chance, that despite its iconic status, that a rational person could still subjectively believe that it was not in the top 5 videos of the year? Is there even a modicum of chance that this isn’t a conspiracy, but just someones subjective and honestly held belief? Ed Sheeran’s Thinking Out Loud and Bruno Mars’ Uptown Funk videos were both extremely memorable. Isn’t there a chance that maybe Nicki Minaj didn’t make the top 5 because she just had strong competition?
I find it difficult to believe the snub is due to larger issues of body shaming and racism. For a start, it’s clear that MTV are not involved in some viscous campaign to destroy Minaj’s career. She’s been nominated 10 times for the VMA’s, and has won twice for Best Hip Hop Video and Best Female Video. So they can’t be totally opposed to her image and appearance. Arguably MTV in 2015 are more attuned to black issues than ever before – nominating Kendrick Lamar’s powerful and controversial video for Alright. The video has an important message about black resilience in the face of white oppression. This is a truly commendable move by MTV, given the song is not commercial and not radio friendly. It’s arguable the most progressive video ever been nominated, both in terms of music and message. And if you want to talk about sidelining important social issues, it would have been even more divisive to ignore Taylor Swift’s Bad Blood clip, with it’s feminist undercurrent and message of empowerment.
I don’t think it’s fair to accuse MTV of ignoring social issues for choosing not to give its highest honour to a video that contains the actual lyric “he tossed my salad like his name Romain,” and even more simply and honestly, “I’m on some dumb shit.”
Look at this man. Look at his twisted, pained expression.
This is the face of a man who has become literally bloated on disappointment. A man who’s been spurned so often by the artistic community, that he was forced to bravely find solace in the sexual embrace of international supermodels. This poor man has been let down more times than he can possibly count. When he lost out to that guy from How To Lose a Guy In 10 Days, he had the good grace to suck up that tide of emotions, put on a brave face for the cameras and then vent in private. He suffered in silence. Can you image the Leonardo tweet?: “if your movie celebrates AIDS stricken men with near skeletal bodies, you will win best actor #dallasbulimiaclub #realmenhavedadbods.” No. You couldn’t. because Leo is from a generation and profession that appreciates good humour, grace and humility.
Congratulating Minaj on her ‘stand’ encourages a culture of petulance. It says: if things don’t go your way, make a scene. It says when bad things happen to good people, it must be a conspiracy. It’s like those facile Facebook customer complaints that are carefully engineered so that they go viral. Someone chasing likes by uploading a picture of a slippery floor with a funny rant, because they know the public relations team has been hamstrung from acting with any level of reasonableness in such a public forum. In the world of art you don’t deserve anything. In a totally subjective profession there is no such thing as ‘being robbed’ – because there is no means by which it can be said that one piece of art is quantifiably superior to any other another. There’s no lack of self-belief in the entertainment industry, but part of being a true champion is knowing how to lose graciously.
Guilty Simpson has unveiled a new track in anticipation of his upcoming album. Simpson is signed to the legendary outfit Stones Throw Records, which boasts such unimpeachable names as Knxwledge, MadLib and Aloe Blacc.
Vanguard Organization has the kind of mimicry of the old school that you might expect from an early Hilltop Hoods track – samples, scratches and a groovy stripped back sound. You could accuse this of yet another example of that Beast Coast / Joey Bada$$ throwback boom bap sound; but the reality is that Guilty Simpson really has been rapping since the early 90’s. This isn’t a homage, it’s a continuation. J Dilla was an admirer of Guilty Simpson, and provided production on his debut album, Ode to the Ghetto. Guilty Simpson isn’t harking back to the golden age; he’s still living it.
There’s shades of MadLib, Flying Lotus and MF Doom. The opening beat promises something brutal, but we’re instead given something in the less is more tradition. It’s almost crying to be ripped apart and reassembled in a massive club remix.
His upcoming album is entirely produced by Katalyst, member of the enigmatic 35-person hip-hop supergroup Quakers. Hip hop heads look out.
Golden Features is often touted as Australia’s next great deep house producer, but whilst he does use some of those signature melodies and vocals, he is much more firmly entrenched in the trap, wobble, and dubstep genres. Golden Features is the master of that shifting gear feel, the locomotive swing where the last movement is the quickest, creating a sense of building intensity.
You can see the influence of forerunner and other modern Aussie great, Flume. It’s a continuation of that original sound that is post-dubstep, and influenced by the trap movement in hip hop, which finds a more natural home in dance music. Golden Features is in some ways more progressive than Flume, with a more dark and cavernous sound, but also has commercial appeal, with some obvious deep house sensibilities and a love for pretty vocals. He has also done away with some of the irregular time signatures that some people find difficult and alienating. He even has Flume’s same affinity with hip hop. In 2012, long before the release of his first album, I had seen Flume play at the exact same venue and from his remixes alone recognized that he was onto something special. Seeing Golden Features in the same spot, with that same wide-eyed fan base was complete déjà vu.
The crowd were completely familiar with the artists two EP’s, only released within the last 15 months, and were most receptive to his original music. The iPhone cameras all came out for the standout track Tell Me, which is maybe most illustrative of his unique sound – some smooth female vocals courtesy of Nicole Millar that’s strangled by a sinister reverberation throughout. It’s exemplary of his blend of the deep house and dubstep traditions. People were acutely aware that this was something they wanted to record for posterity. I was even impressed to hear people sing the lyrics to the infectious Telescope, no easy feat given the song can’t be found on YouTube, and lyrics haven’t found their way onto Genius.com yet. Of course the crowd responded strongest to the stunning No One which is both warm and menacing, and features amazing vocals from Indigenous singer Thelma Plum. Golden Features music is meant to be heard live, because it’s meant to be heard thumping. The room shook for the encore, Factory, a banging bass track.
The same can be said for the rest of his set. Golden Features plays that brand of Southern Rap that only comes to life when played loud in the dancehall setting. Brodinski’s Francois-Xavier sounds laughable on YouTube, but becomes absolutely brutal when it’s coming out of the sound system of the Prince Bandroom. He dropped other booming trap sounds like I Can’t Help Myself and Future’s 3500. It provided an opportunity for those on the dance floor who had managed to carve out some space for themselves to throw some big shapes.
In the style of SBTRKT or Daft Punk, Golden Features wears a solid gold mask obscuring his face. It’s just the kind of imagery that suits his dark sound and lends the act a bit of spectacle and mystery. It’s a gimmick that’s enigmatic, rather than tacky. He looked very at home on the big stage of the Prince Bandroom, and it’s the kind of performance that will benefit in the coming years from an even bigger lightshow.
As Australians have become increasingly discerning with their taste in dance music, Golden Features is bound to find a huge support base amongst his countrymen; who are ready for a home-grown producer making cerebral EDM. Even though his sound is blackhole dark, there’s little doubt he’ll enjoy a very bright future.
Talib Kweli is no stranger to politics and controversy (check our recent interview with him here). However in the past few days the rapper has found himself at the centre of a veritable shitstorm for some Twitter comments he made about ‘white privilege’ that were neither political nor controversial, but in reality, totally rational and completely normal.
In response to the news that the long-running television series The Dukes of Hazard would be pulled from the air due to it’s frequent use of the image of the Confederate Flag, some mouthbreather decided to tweet at Kweli (not the person responsible for television programming) that to ensure complete equality the show The Jefferson’s should also be pulled, because that most vile of words, honky is occasionally used by black characters.
“Black folks out here getting murdered, literally, and white dudes tweeting me mad cuz the Jeffersons still on and George say honky. Wowsers,” Kweli wrote lucidly on July 5.
So then of course, people got angry that this statement obviously meant that Kweli was accusing ALL white people of being racist. Because the only thing worse than judging a man for the colour of his skin, is judging a man for his views on race.
Listen, insecure white people in my mentions, ALL WHITE PEOPLE ARE NOT THE SAME. We cool now? Favorite this tweet for the future.
— Talib Kweli Greene (@TalibKweli) July 5, 2015
Fair deuce. From here, Talib Kweli elaborated further, in one of the more rational yet over-dramatised Twitter rants in recent times.
If I say “hey racism still exists” and you hear & interpret that as “ALL whites are racist, you too”, then you probably are.
— Talib Kweli Greene (@TalibKweli) July 5, 2015
If ppl spent a fraction of the time pushing back against actual oppression that they spend being scared 2 b called racist we’d get somewhere
— Talib Kweli Greene (@TalibKweli) July 5, 2015
In less nauseating news, Kweli has released a 12-song compilation of B-sides. It’s titled Train of Thought: Lost Lyrics, Rare Releases & Beautiful B-Sides Vol. 1, and, given it includes appearances from Kanye West, Killer Mike and Mos Def, this might be more in the ‘A’ mould. You can get it here and check the star-studded tracklisting below:
Train of Thought: Lost Lyrics, Rare Releases & Beautiful B-Sides Vol. 1:
01 Space (prod. by Dave West)
02 2000 Seasons (prod. by Hi Tek)
03 Black Star: Bright As the Stars (prod. by Ayatollah)
04 Wack Niggaz [ft. Common, Kanye West & Consequence] (prod. by Kanye West)
05 Boomerang [ft. NIKO IS, K’Valentine & Cory Mo] (prod. by Cory Mo)
06 Ocean Song [ft. Mela Machinko] (prod. by Rahki)
07 7:30 [ft. RES] (prod. by DJ Quik)
08 Fortfied Live [ft. Yasiin Bey (fka Mos Def) & Mr. Man] (prod. by Hi Tek)
09 Tryin To Breathe [ft. Killer Mike] (prod. by Midi Mafia)
10 Distractions (prod. by Oh No)
It’s a sneakerhead’s wetdream come true with the announcement of this Kendrick Lamar x Reebok collab. Continuing his ruthless takeover of the rap game, Kendrick has made his first mark on the fashion world. This limited drop of Reebok Ventilators are either designed by Kendrick, or more likely, wholeheartedly endorsed by him. The classic kicks are all white save for some candy stripe laces. Oh, and in homage to the warring Blood and Crip gangs of California, one shoe is marked ‘blue’ and the other ‘red.’ The tongue of the shoe also features the classic ‘Kendrick Lamar’ graffiti font, and the Top Dog Entertainment logo – proof that K-Dot has left his mark on these stylish wheels. They are absolutely ice cold and a must-have for any self-respecting career criminal.
Whilst the aesthetic is absolutely spot on, I’m slightly skeptical on the ideology. Far be it from me to criticise the politics or good intentions of King Kendrick, but it kind of seems like Reebok are piggy-backing off gangsta chic to sell shoes and make money. Isn’t Kendrick’s whole message that gang culture is not something that should be glamorised because it’s destroying his community? Isn’t making money off the reputation and imagery of murderous criminals pimping the old butterfly, so to speak? The Blood and Crip theme sort of says, well gangsters are cool, these shoes have a gangster theme, these shoes are cool. That’s certainly the mental gymnastics I did when I took one look at them and decided I would step over my own mother to get them. But maybe I’m approaching this from an extremely white perspective.
Either way we can all agree that Kendrick Lamar is awesome, and these shoes are awesome. We will never see these in Australia.
If watching Dennis Rodman light a double-jointed circus freak on fire is your jam, then look on. Director Grant Singer gives the perfect visuals to the Skrillex remix of Yogi and Pusha T’s Burial. It’s gangster whilst still capturing that jumpy Skrillex glitch. The clip has some of the most outrageous dance moves seen in recent years. But don’t worry, this isn’t the next dance craze because it’s completely inimitable unless you’re double jointed or laugh at the prospect of severe shoulder dislocation. A group of masked ballet-thugs haunt Pusha T, smashing his surroundings whilst jack-knifing the human body in ways that will hurt your teeth. Contortionists and dubstep is a match made in heaven.
Summertime ’06 is a misleading title. Vince Staples‘ breezy single Nate (which found it’s way onto the chillout house blogs) was the perfect rap anthem for a balmy summer’s night – Summertime ’06 is not. Nor is it a rose-tinted throwback to a warm youth, like Frank Ocean’s Nostalgia-Ultra. Instead the title refers to the exact moment in time when Vince Staples lost his innocence. When he realised that the horrors of Long Beach gang life was just a reflection of the cruelty of life itself. The album begins with the troubling squawk of a seagull, while No I.D. provides a lumbering and queasy beat. You can feel the beginning of a sticky heat that leaves people restless and jittery. A lone gunshot creates a total silence. This is not going to be a good summer.
At it’s simplest the album is like many West Coast rap albums in that it is tells the story of Vince’s life growing up in Long Beach, and the inescapable influence of gang culture and crime. It’s distinguished for it’s detached, scientific quality. “More black kids killed from a pill than the feds in the projects/ In the Planned Parenthood playin’ God with ya mom’s check/ You ain’t even been to prom yet,” says Vince on Surf, matter-of-factly. He records his reality for posterity. By reporting objectively on his surroundings, Vince’s message is doubly political. It’s almost Dickensian as a piece of social commentary. For that reason, it shares obvious parallels with another modern classic, Good Kid M.A.A.D City. But where Kendrick Lamar “rose from that dark place of violence” to become a beacon of hope and positivity, what Vince has seen has left him depleted and disillusioned. Summertime ’06 is in many ways Vince’s comic book origin story. We learn of the events that gave Vince his mackerel-eyed look, and his weary drawl.
Vince’s deadpan style further enhances the documentary feel of the album. It also lends credibility to his story. His affectless tone and languorous delivery show the listener that lines like “Folks needed porsches, hoes need abortions” are unembellished. “I wake up feeling like I am the coldest nigga breathing,” Vince breathes on the ice-cold CNB. It’s delivered as a statement of fact, one that he derives no joy from. It’s menacing because it’s effortless and unadorned. But Vince’s laboured voice also betrays his feelings. On Lift Me Up, the album’s closest thing to an anthem, Vince barely manages to muster the energy to repeat the songs refrain. This is the voice of someone exhausted, defeated and stoic. Someone resigned to his fate.
The production is as arresting as the raps, perfectly reinforcing the tense and hollow feel of the album. In many ways the production is not dissimilar from much of modern rap. You can hear the influence of Yeezus and even A$AP Rocky’s A.L.L.A. Clipped drums, distorted electric guitars, shaky synths, and abrupt samples. Clearly, minimalism is the flavour of the month in hip-hop. Visionary beatmaker No I.D. pushes the envelope further to create something truly desolate. No I.D. gives new meaning to “stripped back”, Norf Norf is frightening in its simplicity. The distorted electric guitar gives the album an industrial feel, whilst the random bursts of percussion make it jumpy. Play it loud in a car and feel it’s cavernous, lonely quality. There’s also a vaguely unsettling Latino vibe about it, with Lemme Know and Jump Off the Roof sound like Placido Domengo overdosing on sedatives. If you don’t like the cowbell, this album may not be for you. In fact, whilst the production is fruitier than Earl Sweatshirt’s I Don’t Like Shit, I Don’t Go Outside, I would argue it’s more haunting. The album’s few moments of warmth are therefore significant. The distorted vocals in Might Be Wrong are very much in the My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy mould. Whilst at times the production has an almost deliberate FruityLoops feel to it, there’s no doubt it will be dominant in hip hop for some time.
For these reasons Summertime ’06 will be a favourite with rap critics. It has all the bells and whistles of the modern, thinking man’s rap album. The raps are conscious, political and expert. The beats are so minimal that they can only be enjoyed by those willing to dig deep. You would play this album right between To Pimp A Butterfly and A.L.L.A. at a listening party with other hip hop heads, while you all donned the Emperors New Clothes and rag on 2 Chainz. Vince recognises the irony of white people being the biggest consumers of this brand of indie hip-hop. “All these white folks chanting when I ask them ‘Where my niggas at?’/ Going crazy, got me going crazy, I can’t get with that/ Wonder if they know I know they won’t go where we kick it at?” questions Vince on Lift Me Up. The brilliant video clip for Senorita shows a white family happily watching a dystopian reality television show where working class minorities fight for survival. So whilst the style might be Andy Warhol, the substance is Jane Austen. Whilst aesthetic, this is simply a clinical description of the artist’s surroundings; poverty, crime and despair. It’s an ancient tale made ultra-modern.
Kendrick Lamar has released a classic video clip with his unlikely fourth single, Alright. Director Collin Tilley creates some startling images in his stark black-and-white Compton. K-Dot freestyles while in a friends lowrider, held and carried like a giant sedan chair by 4 white police officers. Authentic characters from the Compton neighbourhood breakdance in front of a giant Jenga block of speakers. One breakdancer sports a t-shirt that reads “100% real negus” – Kendrick’s attempt to properly re-appropriate n*gger. Kendrick hovers like Superman through the desolate streets of Compton, before rapping on top of a massive Californian traffic light. And then there’s the chilling image of three of Kendrick’s homies spraying cash from the roof of a stolen police cruiser, whilst another car drifts perfect circles around them.
Given the incendiary climate of American race relations, the video is unsurprisingly political. An unsettling opening image shows a police officer open fire on a fleeing black male. The police officer has his feet firmly planted to guarantee a killing shot. You could dismiss it as Hollywood exaggeration if it didn’t so strongly resemble the real footage of the Walter Scott shooting.
The clip also uses the plot device of a group of young black men stealing a police cruiser. The video clip echoes Kendrick’s performance at the BET awards, where he performed the song from on top of a battered cop car. Conservative mouthpiece Fox News of course took umbrage with the performance, saying that Kendrick’s lyrics and hip hop itself, have “done more damage to young African-Americans than racism in recent years.” It’s the kind of measured and rational comment that you might expect from a 70 year-old man who tweets half-naked selfies during a lonely Wild Turkey binge.
A normal comment from a normal man.
Rivera said the image sent “exactly the wrong message.” Not quite as wrong a message as a 2.30 shirtless booty call from a 70 year-old, but still fairly wrong.
The clip is just as sophisticated as anything from K-Dot’s classic sophomore To Pimp A Butterfly. Essential viewing.
As far as Shia LaBeouf headlines go, this one is comparatively tame. After giving a screaming motivational speech against a green screen and being raped during a piece of interactive performance art, the news that a) Shia LaBeouf has done a freestyle rap and b) that he may have plagiarized it, should come as a surprise to virtually nobody. LaBeouf’s acid-fuelled twitter account has long been the kind of stream of consciousness that naturally lends itself to freestyle rap.
If you had ever wanted to see a bare-chested and rat-tailed Shia LaBeouf try his hand at freestyle rapping; then look no further.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AAipFsh3Efw
LaBeouf’s freestyle subscribes to the golden rule of the art that says: don’t make it too good or people will think it was rehearsed. It’s pretty simplistic, but you can tell that it is legitimately straight off his mohawked dome. LaBeouf spits some decent bars, and spits real saliva too – adding to his new redneck image. But can LaBeouf ad-lib lines that denigrate his past mainstream success at the behest of members of the cypher? Absolutely. One punter in his entourage calls out “Bumblebee!”, to which LaBeouf quickly responds, “Nah none of that, Transformers is the dummy rap.”
I personally took real notice when LaBeouf drops this heavy punchline right at the end: “Half-ass cash, you could get the fast-cash / but I got a gas mask so you know I got the last laugh.” Of course the line is so expert, because it’s not his own. Rather the lyric belongs to 90’s hip-hop group the Anomolies from their track Perfectionist. Anomolies frontman Pri the Honydark took to Instagram to call out the biting: “you can’t rip songs from my ANOMOLIES crew, recite them in a freestyle as your own, get credit for it, then not expect to be called out by ACTUAL MC’s.”This seems a natural progression for LaBeouf, rapping is one of the best vocations for a person with plagiarist tendencies. Check the whole post from Pri below:
Recently we celebrated the 15-year anniversary of the Marshall Mathers LP. That means it’s been 15 years since Eminem gave us the archetype of the obsessed hip-hop fan, Stan. Stan has a room full of Eminem’s posters and pictures, he owns his entire back catalogue and even has Slim Shady’s name tattooed across his chest. His very name has become synonymous with deranged fandom. In 15 years there have emerged hip hop fans so completely obsessed, so hardcore, that they rival even Stan.
#4. Drake Fans – “Woes”
Drake fans or “woes” if you will, are among the most sickeningly obsessed hip hop fans alive. Many Drake fans turned on MTV Jams in 2009 to hear Aubrey Graham perform The Best I Ever Had and nothing was the same ever since. Drake fans take care to include a Drake reference at every opportunity. Drake fans know themselves, and appreciate that Drake started from the bottom to become a legend that will live forever. Drake fans know the mortal body can only live once, and that one day in October, the 6 God will appear and whisper in their ears “hold on, we’re going home,” and they will ascend beyond the blue sky pictured on the cover art of Take Care to a paradise where Drake will have a complicated relationship with every one of them.
Drake fans are battle-hardened from defending their smarmy idol. No, Drake doesn’t bandwagon jump on sports teams, he’s just personally loyal to the players, he’s the world’s greatest basketball wife – do you have a problem with loyalty? Drake isn’t “soft,” what could be more courageous than being totally transparent with your emotions – do you have a problem with bravery? Yes, Drake did Start from the Bottom despite a previous acting career, in the sense that he is a cheesy Canadian with Jewish heritage who grew to become the realest rapper in the game, I CHALLENGE YOU TO DO THE SAME, YOU CHIEF KEEF-LOVING TROGLODTYE. 0 to 100 real quick.
Much like monks who wear hair shirts to simulate the suffering of Christ, Drake fans subconsciously pray for a breakup, so they can binge on Drake’s more morbid discography and engage in a month long self-flagellation of post-breakup despair. Drake fans are not offended by Drake memes, they actively play a role in creating them. Has a fire been in the news? Why not superimpose Drake’s miserable expression onto the body of an onlooker?
A must-have for any self-respecting Woe.
Drake has one fan that makes Stan look like the kind of guy to stutter on the third verse in Without Me. In 2011 an image of a woman with shaved eyebrows and the word ‘DRAKE’ printed in large varsity letters on her forehead went viral. The story goes that the young woman was adamant that she wanted the name of the singer behind “Hell Yeah Fucking Right” permanently plastered across her face. The tattoo artist expressed the kind of nihilistic apathy that would make a Chuck Palahniuk character blush: “In my opinion this whole world’s going to shit, and shit rolls downhill, so I might as well just jump in, hold my breath.” But the girl’s decision to tattoo Drake’s name becomes less Free Spirit and more Look what You’ve Done when you realise that the girl had shaved off her eyebrows HERSELF, and that she may have been close to Overdose. Maybe this girl was just listening to Drake’s instruction in Free Spirit, “tat my name on you so I know it’s real.” When Drizzy found out he went 0 to 100 real quick. “That’s cool, though, I feel you 100 per cent. That to me is absolutely incredible…the guy who tatted it is a fucking asshole… I don’t fuck with that guy… If I see you I will fuck you up… I mean, it’s crazy. It’s surreal, I don’t even want to look at it anymore.”
Or how about this kid who got the name of Drake’s album EP tattooed to the back of his neck a mere 24 hours after its release? Of course by the time this kid’s mum read the words permanently affixed to her son’s neck, it was too late.
I even gotta tattoo with your name across the chest.
#3. Lil B Fans – “The Task Force”
Lil B is so meta, so ironic, so post-modern it makes my brain hurt. The argument goes that Lil B is not a good rapper, but that this is done deliberately to parody bad rappers, which in turn makes him, the greatest rapper alive. He’s kind of like the Borat of the rap game. Lil B and the internet have a symbiotic, ghost in the machine relationship. It’s not entirely clear which one of them came first. Lil B is like that scene in the Matrix where Agent Smith takes human form. He’s a living breathing meme and the physical manifestation of trolling.
It’s no surprise that his fan base are equally millennial, and a force to be reckoned with on social media. His militant cadre, The Task Force, live by the literal mandate to “protect Lil B at all costs.” In practice this involves trawling social media for any instance of someone badmouthing the Based God and then relentlessly trolling them (even as I write the Task Force are pursuing me). The most recent victim of the Task Force was Joey Bada$$, so mercilessly trolled by this collection of 14 year old gaming prodigy’s, that he deleted his twitter account. Here Joey echoes a common frustration with the Task Force who in perfect trolling fashion, always come across as idiotic and asinine –
It’s almost like people enjoy insulting people over the internet, but don’t want to fight in real life? Weird.
Lil B fans have time to make memes.
But Lil B is more than just a troll, he is a prophet, he is the Based God. Lil B has a unique ethos that seems to resonate with fans. Liking Lil B and liking his music are mutually exclusive. Arguably, his music is not meant to be liked. Put very briefly, the Based God is Christ-like in that he principally preaches a message of positivity, love and acceptance – sort of like the My Little Pony of rap communities.
The online community ‘BasedWorld’ is full of individuals who have found succour in the unconditional love of the BasedGod. The teachings of Lil B have a profound effect on the everyday lives of his followers. Brandon Skipper, known as Skip in BasedWorld said, “I started to apply what Lil B was saying in his more serious songs to my life…I don’t have a job. I ain’t in school right now, but every day I go outside and look at the sky…and I’m happy.” Brittany Fransko met her boyfriend Jebriel Teague through BasedWorld, “a lot of people I’ve known for six months through BasedWorld are closer to me than friends I’ve had my whole life…that’s why I’m glad my boyfriend is based.” 60 year old Grandpa Chip recognised Lil B’s message as the unique world view of the youth of today. He told his wife that listening to Lil B was necessary to connect and relate with his grandkids. And if you don’t believe me, here’s a video clip that he bothered to make, which he surely wouldn’t do If he was faking it right?
Go to a Lil B concert and prepare to see some serious Hillsong shit. More like bacchanal religious ecstasy than a rap show, fans come kitted out in Chefs outfits, and offer cats and their girlfriends as living tributes to the Based God.
Or maybe they’re all just trolling.
#2. Odd Future Fans – “Golf Wang Hooligans”
The reason Odd Future listeners are so fanatical is because the group was originally marketed as a death cult. It wasn’t just music, it was a completely immersive experience that would impact on every aspect of a persons life. Like all good cults it had its own iconography. The ‘upside down cross’ and the ‘bubble writing’ were perfect symbols for an angsty teenager with above average art skills to deface an exercise book with in an act of silent protest during double Math. And like all good cults it even has a droning repetitive chant that adepts can shout mindlessly, slogans like “Free Earl” and “Fuck Steve Harvey” and of course, “swag.” And like all good cults, the Church of Golf Wang has a uniform. Forget the matching black tracksuit and purple shrouds, when Tyler began designing clothes he created the unique opportunity to shape his adherents in his own image. The transition to clothing meant that people could literally wear their fandom on their sleeve. Find a 5 panel cap, some long bright socks and a tye-died t-shirt and you know you’ve found a member of the Wolf Gang. It wasn’t just a genre of music anymore, it was an identity.
A quick Google search reveals that Odd Future fans are universally loathed. “Worse than Juggalos” wrote one punter in a forum dedicated exclusively to the subject. Even the artists themselves are embarrassed by their own fans. “Male virgins” Earl Sweatshirt called them in a recent tweet. Colossus is Tyler’s very own homage to Stan, in which a loner fan harasses Tyler at a theme park. Tyler mocks these sociopaths with a love for street wear, “I like pants that cut are cut, I like words like fuck” says the fan.
So what’s so offensive about these progressive hip-hop zealots? Mainly, because they are white and because they are tweens. When asked about why they liked Odd Future one Michael Cera-looking fan said because “they’re against the system,” when asked if he too was against the system, he said he was “unsure.” Another fan replied simply and honestly, “because they’re black.” Odd Future is sometimes credited with the increased tolerance of white people using the n-word. They’re also seen as rich which is the easiest reason to hate anyone for anything.
666 is my number, you can get it off my tumblr.
#1. Insane Clown Posse Fans – “Juggalos”
It’s real, real easy to hate the Insane Clown Posse. In fact, go to any Gathering of the Juggalos (go on) and you can readily purchase t-shirts that read “the most hated band in the world.” They’re Hitler to Nickelback’s Mussolini.
The most hated band in the world gave birth to the worlds most obnoxious fans, the “Juggalos.” They represent a counterculture that is perennially uncool. They’re the bastard lovechild of two of the most unpopular subcultures in the world: emos and rednecks. They’re not fans of mixed martial arts and alcohol (cool things), but wrestling and faygo root beer (uncool things). They’re the only people still left on Myspace (uncool), and don’t use Facebook (really cool).
Watch any Juggalo documentary and prepare for 30 minutes of shit-faced white people trying to juggle a 2 litre Faygo, a gravity bong and explosives. Juggalos have done more for the whipped cream dispenser industry than chefs have. They love crappy tagging, exposed breasts, fast food, and the worlds lamest call-to-arms “whoop whoop”. Oh, and then there’s the guy who applies his clown make-up with ACTUAL SPRAY PAINT.
Then there’s their obvious fascination with the macabre; serial killers and an evil clown mythology. The association with violent crime led to the FBI ranking the Juggalos next to Blood and Crips in terms of dangerous gangs. (A completely ludicrous charge FYI).
But Juggalos have used their marginalisation to create a really unique and special camaraderie. They have used the shared experience of being excluded from mainstream of society to unite them. Juggalos have been outsiders their whole lives, whether because they are overweight, have pink hair, piercings, tattoos, or just because they happen to like the crappy Insane Clown Posse. Juggalos know what it’s like to be rejected, and because of that they vow to never exclude anyone else.
The Juggalo community is one of complete acceptance. Hippie Joe, a 40 year-old pipefitter and father of four from Detroit said the Gathering of Juggalos is “not a place where you’re going to be judged.” He describes the yearly pilgrimage to the Gathering as “coming home.” Aside from whoop whoop the other Juggalo catch cry is “Fah-Mu-Lee” – all 5,000 attendees at the Gathering of Juggalos are one big family. Despite the aggressive lyrics and Fear and Loathing quantity of drugs, there are never any fights at the Gathering. One fan, who vomited on a carnival ride and then passed out, acknowledged the impact the Juggalo life has had on him “made me the motherfucker I am today, without Jay and Shaggy – I grew up to be a decent good hearted motherfucker.”