stitches

The Game vs Stitches: The Complete Saga

Biggie vs Tupac. Jay vs Nas. Every generation has its own great hip-hop feud. A lyrical battle that devolves into a deadly physical confrontation. The hip-hop headlines this week have been dominated by the latest rap war between West Coast legend The Game and “Stitches.”

You could be forgiven for only ever having heard the name Stitches in connection with his fight with The Game. Apparently, Stitches is an 18-year-old unsigned rapper from Miami who has offensive facial tattoos and speaks like Foghorn Leghorn. Stitches is responsible for the fittingly titled viral sensation Brick In Yo Face. The ear-splitting trap drums and brandishing of high tech military-grade weaponry makes you feel like someone has shot a kilo of cocaine directly into your eyeballs. The bridge of the song casually repeats “I love sellin’ blow,” with those exact words written in WordArt superimposed over the image of Pinhead from Hellraiser gleefully throwing handfuls of cocaine around a vacant apartment.

Like Hanging Rock or the Marie Celeste, no one knows exactly all the details of The Game/Stitches beef. The best working theory is that Stitches is part of that breed of rapper (think Hopsin) that has like, pre-prepared diss tracks that he puts on into the ether in the hope that he can clickbait people into hearing his other music. Look no further than this pointless Tyga/Kylier Jenner diss track – like there was some universe where Kylie Jenner was going to hit back with some fire bars and call Stitches out.

Presumably, Stitches cobbled together a similar diss track aimed at The Game. Plus, in an effort to drum up likes, Stitches supposedly whipped open MS Paint and forged some communiqué with The Game. “Number one, I ain’t sent yo faggot ass no DM” responded The Game via Instagram.

Things made the painful jump from the virtual world to the real, when Stitches tried to enter a Miami club that was hosting The Game. The Game, probably still shitty about the fake DM’s, had security bar Stitches entrance. When Stitches sauntered over to The Game and his crew, Wack 100 (a man worthy of his moniker and surely one of the most hands-on managers around) hit the Miami newcomer so hard he was ironically left with 4 literal stitches.

After he regained consciousness, Stitches was arrested for possession of weed, and resisting arrest. Stitches took to social media to express his lack of concern.

“You can shoot me next time and I’ll still laugh. At the end of the day everyone knows you were scared to walk up that day….Show everyone you a Gangsta and let’s step in the ring. A man to man fight.”

But this wasn’t the last Instagram was to hear from the Miami rapper. After being released from jail, he took to social media to concede that he had been bashed a second time – this time by members of his own crew. “Yeah I got sucker-punched the other day, ain’t nobody hiding their face, and I got jumped by my own n*ggas yesterday” says Stitches in the second home movie. He then proceeds to produce a miniature white dog, and begins to compare his enemies to the tiny dog. “This dog right here is harder than all y’all, he can do more damage than all y’all.”

The physical assault that Stitches suffered is nothing compared to the social media beat-down he has suffered at the hands of The Game.

The Game’s finest hashtag from the whole feud (and I promise you this was hard to pick) has to have been: #myLipsAintGotStichesInEmSoICanEatThatPussyLikeAMonster. Clearly after this The Game began to lose his train of thought because the next hashtag was slightly more off topic, and I quote #LetMeTapThatPearlRealGentlyWithMyIndexFinger

Hopefully this isn’t the last we’ve heard from Stitches or The Game.