Murder is the leading cause of death for rappers

A new study has revealed that murder is the leading cause of death for rappers.

Initially, I thought the report had been prepared by my dad. I thought dad might have been inspired to conduct the study after the successful delivery of a pithy gag that played on the homonym of 50 Cent the rapper, and 50 cent the denomination.

But the study was in fact conducted by a much more reputable organisation, the University of Sydney. Diana Theadora Kenny, a professor of psychology at the University of Sydney examined over 13,000 musicians, to conclude that more than 50% of all rappers had their lives ended by homicide. Kenny follows in the footsteps of John Eccles or Fred Hollows and continues a proud heritage of Australian excellence in the sciences

Kenny said that while murder only accounted for “6.0% of deaths across the sample” it was “the cause of 51% of deaths in rap musicians.” Kenny suggested that the link between hip-hop and the sixth commandment might be due to the “genres strong associations with drug-related crime and gang culture.”

Country musicians affirmed their position as lamest in the music game, with only a pathetic 1.9% murdered. Perhaps surprising is the fact that 4.4% of all folk musicians were murdered. World musicians were seemingly dying in droves, with over 9.5% murdered.

These results might seem surprising for most people. I can name plenty of rappers that haven’t been murdered. And when I do think of murdered rappers, there are only two names that ever come to mind…

magnolia Soulja_Slim

R.I.P Magnolia Shorty and Soulja Slim you live on in your music – specifically Monkey On Tha Di$K and Soulja Fa Lyfe

Statistically speaking, out of: Jay-Z, Eminem, Kanye West, Kendrick Lamar, Drake, Birdman, Rich Homie Quan, French Montana, Chief Keef and Young Thug – five of them MUST die.